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napalm sunday- demos

by daughter cells

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1.
identity crisis + the snowy range 02:24
lyrics
(v1) im dead set on indecision never like any of my options anyway oh anyway whats so wrong with self destruction only recognize myself in chaos anyway oh anyway (c) i promise im alright right now ill try not to go back out i dont know who i am or what i care about (v2) i ignore all the old incisions i’m sick of reminiscing anyway oh anyway lessons in harm reduction there’s never any long term payoff anyway oh anyway (c) i promise im alright right now get by just fine without i dont know who i am or what i care about will i ever feel alive somehow or will i just hide out i dont know who i am or what i care about
2.
napalm sunday 03:30
lyrics
(verse one) A shitty hand but I guess I’ll play How many Hail Marys do I have to say my brain still fills with napalm every sunday am i the only one who cant decide i just wanna make up my mind the not knowing keeps on growing deep inside ive only ever asked to see the truth is that too much to ask of you was there a vision that i missed or was it misconstrued (chorus) i’ll stop asking you for reasons if you won’t tell me why i’ll just sit here and sink into the sky (v2) frantic and feather-light lift me up and watch me fly a sound so sweet it makes my cavities cry Maybe there’s nothing left to find An empty space oh Jesus Christ who will i be when my depravity dies (chorus) -instrumental?? (chorus)
3.
...and the fifth calypso 02:16
info
4.
coming of rage 03:05
lyrics
hear me out ill be okay im just getting tired of wasting away wasting away hear me out i swear im fine just searching for some peace of mind so what if im falling behind theres a memory i cant sweat out low blood pressure, warbled sounds not much to do about it now dont wanna think about it so ill just drink about it why cant i learn to let it go 3 hours weekly spent with joe i made angels in ohio same fever since 13 what does post-traumatic mean and what the hell is guanfacine the so called best years of my life restless days and norco nights at least it keeps me alive dont wanna think about it so ill just drink about it dont wanna think about it dont wanna think about it
5.
agoraphobic boyfriend 04:02
info
6.
the pitcher plant 04:21
lyrics
right along i told you id do you wrong drown yourself and wake up with someone elses clothes on once or twice you asked me to make up my mind i said i dont like choices then chose getting high sometimes i feel like im a pitcher plant trap whoever gets close and digest them just because i can its not your fault i smell like honey but you shouldve been more careful just like everyone else i deceived i am a pitcher plant id like to change but i probably cant break me down break my heart ill pull through its just about filling the void in me it was never really about you i will be whatever you think you need might not be good at much but ive mastered adaptability sometimes i feel like im a pitcher plant trap whoever gets close and digest them just because i can its not your fault i smell like honey but you shouldve been more careful just like everyone else i deceived i am a pitcher plant id like to change but i probably cant i am a pitcher plant
7.
carrion 03:27
lyrics
you are a wildfire you spread until you reach the sea you touch the waves then you come back to me I am a nightmare You’re a scared little boy trying to fall asleep you’re not as brave as you pretend to be Stop acting like we’re fine I’m done waiting for a sign (Chorus) If you want me say so I’m sick of seeing you around If you want me say so God why can’t I ever turn you down Break it off, I’m not cold enough I’m not bold enough to see it through Second guess your hands around my neck Was it just about a little death for you (Chorus) I’ve started to hate your smile Maybe I’ll be able to hate you after a while ?? ?? You’re such a fucking joke But I need you like I need to smoke (Chorus) (Outro) If you love me say so I guess I’ll just see you around If you love me say so You only ever let me down
8.
the orator 03:35
lyrics
Maybe I don’t have the guts to talk Maybe being silent says it all Maybe I just forgot how to speak Without sounding like I’m searching for sympathy Disconnect and disregard Dispose of the growth i’ve made so far Send me a message and I won’t respond It’s not like theres anything going on but It’s hard to hold things together now Waiting for the day that I confess Secrets kept I need to get off my chest A thousand words I’ve never said I try to sound em out but I can’t fucking catch my breath Finally said everything I meant to say Haven’t crawled out of this bed in days I’m here hanging around They said the truth would set me free but I only feel more pinned down chorus -bridge- Now I say whatever I want to say I’m fine with oversharing anyway x??? -chorus-
9.
tramadol 02:21
lyrics
curse the echoes in my head force myself to go to bed im always running out of breath sylvia's been good to me im keeping up with therapy but how much energy can i have left its only tramadol its only melanchole its only its only curse the silence in my head force myself up out of bed maybe my dreaming's lacking depth it was almost better now i nearly even made it out but the future gets blurrier the closer i get its only tramadol a little bit not much at all its only im only
10.
turbulent/the first line 02:55
lyrics
patron saint of broken things i tried to fly with unsteady wings there's a hole where my soul should be i'm not sad right now, i'm just angry still feel it burn inside me so bright that it blinds me will i ever pull myself together this poison is familiar it's never tasted better patron saint of broken minds i'm fucked up and that's the bottom line stone cold sober i'm not alright but when i'm nodding out i feel just fine (4 more lines i havent written yet) still feel it burn inside me so bright that it blinds me will i ever pull myself together this poison is familiar it's never tasted better
11.
sinkhole 03:33
lyrics
where’s your heart think of your family wouldn’t they be sad to see you go where’s your sense you know the rates and prevalence so why the fuck do you feel so alone It’s not like I want it The grayness is a ghost and I am haunted spin out of control until the earth swallows me whole how do i turn off my head how do i spend an hour out of bed I’ll stay here and decay till I am bone it’s been a century this year or is it nine- christ how did i get here wish i could remember so i could atone It’s not like I want it The grayness is a ghost and I am haunted spin out of control until the earth swallows me whole It’s not like I want it The grayness is a ghost and I am haunted spin out of control until the earth swallows me whole
12.
hang around 03:01
lyrics
god i wonder what it feels like to be the only one swimming through your head ill float here instead do you hear that in the background too far away to touch but it feels profound i'll hang around i see you swirling around me your pious hands and gentle nervousness i see you swirling around me lovely, a portrait in dizziness i should forget you, that's what my mom said but how can i forget what i never had you keep coming back there's an echo creeping in now too close to ignore, everything's too loud but i'll hang around i see you swirling around me your pious hands and gentle nervousness i see you swirling around me lovely, how could you love me when i'm such a mess i see you swirling around me i see you swirling around me i see you swirling around me

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released November 25, 2020

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